Inside her Stomach is Her Heart

Occassionally I’ll get personal and I’ll let you peek into the nonsensical world I call my own. I adore reading your stories and connecting with you, so I feel the best thanks is to be honest and sharing as well.

Me? Pregnant? Surely not.. I’d always been told it would be tough for me to conceive if not impossible. I had stopped taking my birth control for about a year now and I had to admit I felt a little strange.

Many friends in the past had told me, “You just know.” .. and I had found that very hard to believe, but here I was feeling the same way they described. Something was different. I began to feel constantly nauseated and went to the dr assuming I had caught some sort of flu. They wanted to do a pregnancy test and as they excitedly sprinted back into the room I knew what the result was.

“.. So are you trying to have a baby? It’s positive!”

My husband looked at the ceiling in absolute shock, tears of happiness along with smiles and a lot of “are you serious??” We had always wanted to someday.. but just weren’t sure if it would happen so we didn’t put a lot of pressure on it. I had hardly considered a baby and here I was expecting. We left with some shots and tests ecstatic beyond our wildest imaginations. .. So we have a new family member?

I’ve tried not to get too attached to the idea and waited to tell everyone because deep down inside I worry that something will be wrong but there it is, nestled in my abdomen safe and sound. It’s too good to be true. I’m so excited to meet them, care for them and show them the world. It’s been my absolute dream to weave a childhood of happiness and sweet memories with my husband.

I’m 17 weeks pregnant now and in three weeks we’ll find out if the baby is a girl or a boy — we’re excited for either, of course! I’m pretty feminine so a girl would easily become the center of my world, but with the unsurpassable love I experienced when my nephew was born and as he has grown, I know I’ll be absolutely pleased with a healthy boy or girl.

Oh, Miseducated, how I miss you and our talks — I’ve developed a new schedule so that I’ll have more time for my very favorite project, you. In the future you’ll meet my newest work of art, the baby of my dreams.